Life of Nick

I was living in a large modern house set back from the main road, surrounded by trees where the boundry to the property was encircled by a dry stone wall.

My life was being narrated by Nick Offerman very much like the movie Life of Chuck.

A group of assassin’s for whatever reason had tried killing me with flimsy silver guns. There was a mix of handguns and bolt action rifles, both using iron sights and both were silenced.

Of the initial group of assassins, I’d killed all of them bar two who had split up from the main group and seemed to be bringing up the rear, totally unaware of the initial groups demise.

One was an older white haired woman, the other; a younger black woman. I sighted the older woman first and hit her in the spine using a rifle.

I then hit the younger woman in the head instantly killing her while she checked on her fallen comrade still unaware of what was going on.

I approached the still alive older woman in a clearing with tree stumps and asked her who was still alive, and who sent them however she refused to answer any of my questions so I shot her in the forehead with a silenced pistol before building a small pile of wood behind a wall where I planned to burn the bodies.