Football tournament

I’m back at high school and my whole class from year 11 is sneaking up a grass banking to try to compete in an officially organised football tournament.

When we get to the top of the banking to the astroturf we’re all presented with colour coordinated shirts and sweatbands but when I try to put on my sweatband it’s too small and breaks. My P.E. teacher tells me I’ll receive a lower mark if I don’t play in a sweatband, I reply to her that I don’t care.

Two of my friends from class come up to talk to me and mention that my facial hair looks like three seagulls.

At the end of the astroturf pitch is a topless woman doing the long jump, hands covering her breasts, she’s not getting very good distances but everyone on the pitch is enthusiastically cheering her on instead of playing football.